Fuck the Berzerkers. Hate the Berzerkers. Hate them with all of your heart, with the heart within your heart reserved for hating, and with the space within that hatred space let a fire burn which destroys everything except the one pointed white hot hatred for the Berzerkers. What you lack in ingenuity and genuine talent, make up for with intensity. Several people have asked questions as to the nature and practice of postcryptozoology as a contemplative discipline as distinct from the Ecstatic Mystery Cult of the Yeti. Several others have asked questions concerning the nature of the Berzerkers and how they fit together. This text offers perfect, complete and final answers to these concerns.

The Berzerkers are at once the carnies of the landed class and the landed class itself. Marx refers to them as fungi in the Grundrise. They breed by spores, and suck the life out of the ideologically and spiritually generative members of society. They expect 550$ on the first of every month. They lack subtly and tack. They own new Toyota's and infinitely tasteless knick-knacks from Pier One Imports They think that these cute luxuries are more important then keeping their tenants bobbing above the poverty line. They don't think at all. If they had their druthers they hold the real wage stable against rising costs of living for the rest of eternity.

They broke my bicycle chain and toilet. They said I couldn't give insane NFL football players their paxil anymore because of substandard mopping. They said I couldn't work for peace anymore for a subliving wage salary because I missed a semi colon and failed to follow official NGO policy RE: serial commas as per last weeks urgent agency-wide style sheet memo. They put me on Welbutrin and Ritalin in high school. They hate living systems. Their sex is an entirely non-tactile experience.

Economically, the term Berzerker refers to the landed class, as distinct from the surplus extracting business class. Sociologically it refers to the human components of the post-human bureaucracy. Postcryptozoologically it refers to a mildly asymmetrical agent/peon of Mr. Fantisto. Aesthetically it refers to going to Ikea with your parents while dad searches for the Deal and mom needs a drink. (FYI dad's Deal is not a defeat of the Berzerkers.) Spiritually the Berzerkers are Avartars of Kaal, meditated in some as yet not clearly understood way, through an office in Fantisto's castle in Malta. Through their inane and scripted forms of excess, passive aggressive communications, and unapologetic fascism they construct Time, which serves as a veil between the broke and unemployed handsome spiritual seeker and the Timeless Beloved. Emotionally the Berzerkers are FUCK THE BERZERKERS. FUCK THE BERZERKERS. FUCK THE BERZERKERS.

Before one can begin the Sadhna of hating the Berzerkers, one must, as preparatory work, rid herself of all Berzerker apologetics. Hating the Berzerkers is a radically hip form of Neo-Manicheanism; you must but set aside your weekend pre-cognitive Advaita and come to Know that the universe is composed of two eternally distinct substances: Berzerkers and Luminous Science. They are not useful. They are not necessary. They are not in any sense redeemable; they are eternally circumscribed outside the Christos. In fact their defeat is indistinguishable from your Salvation. Therefore, ULTIMATE COMPLETE PERFECT FUNDAMENTAL TOTAL DEFEAT is your GOAL.

Once you see this as your goal you are on the path. Close your eyes tight enough to give your self a headache, clench and grind your teeth, concentrate on a specific Berzerker and repeat, utilizing the energy of rage, the following sentences:
"Fuck the Berzerkers, Hate the Berzerkers.
May the Berzerkers come to Perfect Defeat.
May the Berzerkers come to Ultimate Defeat.
May the Berzerkers come to Fundamental Defeat.
May I be strengthened in my quest to defeat the Berzerkers.
Fuck the Berzerkers, Hate the Berzerkers."
You can also visualize yourself physically destroying a Berzerker, holding a Berzerker hostage naked in your bathtub, and unleashing a relentless array of Defeat focused Psy-ops. You can administer unnecessarily aggressive maneuverings in the post at your local basketball court. You can put your own head through a sheet rock wall in the bedroom you grew up in.

In doing this practice with vicious discipline and regularity you will come to cultivate the Four Berzerker Viharas, which are the immeasurable minds of Science cleanly poised against the Berzerkers.

The Four Berzerker Viharas are

1. Ametta: hating meanness
2. Akaruna: mercilessness
3. Amudita: schadenfreude- taking pleasure in another's defeat (German, from Schaden damage + Freude joy)
4. Aupekkha: dangerous excitability.

Berzerker Defeat Sadhna is Abhakti, it is anti-devotional practice, it saying NO:

I pledge no allegiance to the Berzerkers.
I am not devoted to the Berzerkers.
I am anti-devoted to the Berzerkers.
The Berzerkers are not my Master.
The Berzerkers are not my joy, my path, my door.
I am not tempted to become a Berzerker myself.
I am not willing to veil my science to make Berzerkers comfortable.
I am not willing to apologize for the Berzerkers.
I am not going to be distracted from the goal of defeat.
I am unapologetic about my desire to defeat the Bezerkers.
I give nothing unto the Berzerkers.

I will defeat the Berzerkers in a way so fundamental as to render the Berzerkers eternally nonexistent backward in time, a complete erasure of everything except the pure and holy memory of the defeat of the Berzerkers, who never existed because they were defeated by the practice of infinitely perfect Berzerker Hatred Sadhna. There is only the SCIENCE of postcryptozoology, which gives rise to Berzerker Hatred Sadhna, and itself makes reference to the Berzerkers who were defeated so fundamentally as to never have existed. So there is really no neo-Manichaeism, I was just telling you that while you were learning not to apologize. Fundamental Defeat. Fuck the Berzerkers. Hate the Berzerkers.